Weird

Almost a full year since I came up with the idea of the Coin Roll Cable Holder Thing I put the idea up on Instructables and lo and behold, the idea gets noticed. It's strange seeing yourself on another blog somewhere, and realizing that people actually like your idea. It's a weird feeling, especially when it's on one of the sites that I frequent (Lifehacker, by way of Apartment Therapy). It's pretty rad getting a little recognition, even if it's only on the internets. Unless that recognition is a guy calling you Harry Potter, then it's back to therapy for me...at least he said I was smart.

So yeah, go read Lifehacker and Apartment Therapy. They know where the fresh is at. 4realz.

Munn-dane Writing: In Defense of EB Games/GameStop

I was hovering around digg and unfortunately came across this article from Aeropause. Titled "Hey GameStop! Stop Opening My New Games!", this whine-laden fiasco written by one James Munn is aimed at GameStop's policy of opening new games (hence the informative title). As lots of people know, GameStop is now the majority owner of EB Games, even those here in Canada. Since we have the same practice, I figured I'd take a shot at deciphering this crap-fest.

I stood there and watched the clerk open the cabinet and lift out a Sid Meier's Pirates designed users manual. I see him pop open an empty PSP case and slide it in."I said NEW." I replied angrily, having seen this before and knew what he would say

I'm trying to figure out what's actually happened here. He would not receive an empty PSP case, they're simply not around. Unless he's told ahead of time that "this case was damaged during shipping, if you still want it in a different case we can knock off ten percent", there is absolutely no way he'd be getting an empty case. No, what he likely left out was that the clerk searched in the system for the game, found that one copy was left (the game is selling surprisingly well, so this is highly possible), and went to get the case from the floor. Afterwards, the clerk finds the game behind the counter, wrapped in (depending on the store) a Ziploc bag or a paper CD sleeve (like some PC games come in). I will say this now and reiterate it later: THESE GAMES HAVE NEVER BEEN PLAYED, THEREFORE, THEY ARE NOT USED. As for Munn's outburst of "I said NEW"? Yeah, retail employees love that tone. In fact, they get off on it. We know what you said, asshole. If Munn wanted some confirmation on the product, then he could try asking politely. I'm not his mom, I shouldn't have to tell him this...but then, if she had told him how to behave in the first place, he'd probably have kicked the jackass habit before it ever started.

*voice shaking* "This is new," I was furious at this point. It was cold and late and I didn't have time for his crap. "So if I walk out the door right now with that unsealed case then walk back in here next week with it in the same condition, you'll give me full return credit as a new game? I mean, it IS new after all right!?"

I have to say, "*voice shaking*" really puts me in the moment. It's like I'm there. Munn claims a furious demeanour. "It was cold and late and I didn't have time for his crap." Honestly, it was probably the same sentiment on the other side of the counter.

What Munn says about the policy is the main catalyst for my anger. It shows a customer who is uninformed, believes they know better than the employee, and is cheap. Unfortunately, a small, but noticable, percentage of customers are just like him.

Munn continues to claim he's had employees "trying to sneak the game into a bag" and admonishes GameStop for trying to "repeatedly pull this crap on unsuspecting buyers".

While I could easily tell him not to shop there if it bothers him so much, I'd rather drag that point out: "It's a pretty underhanded practice and even though I did end up buying Pirates yesterday, it was only because the game cost me $15 of a gift card." Reading Munn's glorified RSS feed blog (leeching news from Kotaku, Joystiq, etc.), it appears that at least three members of the Munn household "writes" for it. If James has such a problem with GameStop, his family would know, no doubt. So why are they buying him gift cards at a store he so despises for their "underhanded practices"? There's also this gem: "I was waiting for it and called them on it, but I'm sick and tired of having to do it every time." Man, what a rebel. That's like a Crash Test Dummy trying to tell Ford not to be a dick. Sure, you don't like it, but you'll be back.

What I'd like to know is what Munn does at his game store. By that, I mean the one he must own, in order to know better. At EB Games/GameStop, we're stuck having to put cases out on the floor for display purposes. When we open the games for display ("gutting"), we do it carefully. We are gamers too, and we do give a damn about the product. When we gut the game, we print a SKU label, put the disc in a Ziploc bag, and put it in a drawer where it's alphabetized and safe. The display case is put on the floor, and the other copies are put behind the counter or in the back room, still wrapped. If the wrapped ones sell out, we're stuck selling the display copy. The display copy, mind you, is still brand new. It has never been played. So, we put the disc in the case, and seal it with a clear plastic sticker. It is still brand new. The consumer gains nothing with the purchase of the sealed one over the floor copy (unless the consumer has a bizarre shrink-wrap fetish, which I'm sure exists in the internet tubes somewhere). If a customer has a problem with it (granted, the price stickers can be a pain, but you deal with that at HMV and Chapters and no one complains), most of us, time willing, will get them a new case without price tags. Just ask.

The shrink-wrap and the stickers used to seal the cases serve the same purpose: giving the consumer a chance for a refund if they change their minds before they open the game. People will argue "Oh, well I didn't know the game was going to suck." Wahhh. There's a reason Blockbuster, game magazines, and GameRankings exist. If someone buys a game and either beats it or dislikes it within the 7 - 14 day warranty period, they should not be eligible for a refund. I know for a fact that if you try that at a CD store like HMV or FYE you'll get your ass laughed at. Why should a game store be any different? If you buy it, you're stuck with it. I'm aware that it's a corporate-friendly mentality, but when you're on my side of the counter you begin to understand why it makes sense. In the last week I've seen three articles on Wii mod chips, talked to a few customers about modding an Xbox 360 and sold a copy of Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories for the sole reason of exploiting the firmware on the PSP. So what's to stop people from buying a game, ripping an ISO of it and returning it? If you're going to do that, use GameFly, Zip or Blockbuster, they don't care. Why spend more money with more chance of not getting it back? Beyond the pirates, it's completely unfeasible to expect a refund on something you paid $50 for and don't like. Do your research.So what is the difference between a sealed game and a resealed game? There isn't one. Employees don't steal things from the game, and if we do, we're charged and fired. We are the first ones investigated if a copy of World of Warcraft comes back with a damaged or missing CD key. You're protected by a 7- or 14-day warranty (depending on what store you shop at), meaning if there is a problem with your game, even if you do the damage, the store will replace the game for you (provided you have your receipt, which is embarrassingly hard for a lot of people, it seems). You will get another copy of the SAME GAME. This is not hard to understand. If you were able to get something else, you'd be at a rental joint.

I honestly don't know what else to say. James Munn, you are a whiner. You and your ilk make retail the hell that it can be. Just because your game is not factory fresh doesn't mean the store is screwing you over. Go ahead, pop Pirates into your PSP. Enjoy it and convince yourself you've had a victory over Game$top. Next time, think ahead about the awful trials you are continously privy to at our store and turn right the hell around and go to Best Buy. We don't want you.

Bonus edit:

I just wanted to mention one thing. Our stores have to have display copies of games on the floor. We can't afford to have a demo or promo case for every single game we sell (really, we can't. A game store isn't as profitable as you'd think). It is entirely irrational to expect a store to do that. If you get to the store and you're stuck with the last copy of the game, either suck it up and buy it or go somewhere else.

The Coin Roll Cable Holder Thing

So instead of going to bed like a normal human being (indeed one who has class at 8:30am), I decided to dick around on the internet, looking for something that would tame the mess of cable extending from my headphones:

Upon measuring I concluded that the length of the cable was approximately 30km.

I came across a few things, no more than moulded plastic things in the shape of an 8, which you wrap your cables around and weave through. They were neat. I did not think the prices were neat though. One by Belkin costs something like $15, and it looks like they just glued two milk bag openers together. So I said "bollocks to this," and I went about the apartment in search of junk that I could use to make my own. I gave up and looked for a beer instead, but just as I was reaching for one I noticed something on top of the fridge. Elaine, having worked in the restaurant business for half her life, has amassed quite a collection of coin holders. You know, the cardboard roller things...these:

Found: most exciting picture on the internet.

Yeah. You know them. I took the pennies one ($0.50 g-g-g-g-UNIT) Anyways, at work I'm pretty much the man when it comes to wrapping cable up (I think I have OCD about it there, which is weird if you know me and cables), and I figured I could get my cables into this sucker. I looked at the prospect below and wondered, is this even possible? Perhaps!

Rumours whirl about the "is it/isn't it" affair between headphones and coin roll thing

The following are instructions on how to make my really awesome Coin Roll Cable Holder Things:

First, take the plug end of your headphones (using the other end would be both stupid and impossible) and pass it through the coin roll. Now, the rolls have one end already rolled, so pass the plug through that end first, and out the unrolled end. This helps with the cables sliding out:

"HISS! HISS!" said the Cable Snake.

Weave the whole thing through. Now, slide the roll down to somewhere comfortable: your pocket area, your hand area, your whatever area. Just make sure you have enough lead on your headphones up top to allow for movement.

This is Pocket Country.

Now that you've got it at a comfortable distance, take the plug-ended length of cable and wrap that shit up. Fold it so it's just about the same size as the coin roll. Dig it:

Thumbs up for odd gestures!

Make it super compact, then slide the coin roll up around it. It should go in pretty nicely:

They throw these at nerd weddings.

Now, all that's left is to basically cram the rest of it right the hell in. In the end, it should look like this:

Fascinating!

And that's pretty much it. I tried making a case for my iPod shuffle out of it, considering they're pretty much the same size, but Short Round (my shuffle) was having none of it. Too bad, that would've been so money.

Anyhow, that's enough nerding for me.

Good night, children.

Facts!

I've got school in the morning, so you get facts from our friends Copy and Paste.

Since our last check-up we've had an improvement! The browser breakdown for visitors here is this:

1. Firefox (56%)
   
2. Netscape and Internet Exploder - tie (21%)
   
3. Ask Jeeves (2%)
   

First off, I'm so happy you kids are using Firefox more. Second, you're still using IE, oh 21 percent? What do the five fingers say to the face? Slap. That's correct. I wasn't sure that Netscape still existed, so either people are using computers from 10 years ago or I'm just trippin'. And Ask Jeeves? What the fuck.

Next is the operating system:

1. Windows XP (46%)
2. Linux UNIX (24%)
   
3. Unknown (23%)
4. Windows ME/2000 (3%)
   
5. Windows 98 (1%)

Windows XP does not surprise me, Linux does. And Unknown? Holy shits there are mystery OSes about! And to whoever is using Windows 98: My cell phone can run Windows 98. Get a new computer.

Other neat-o facts:

• 7.25% have your screens set to 800x600. Either your monitor is from the Crusades or you're just content with blinding headaches. Oh well.
• 1.45% have your screens set to 1600x1200. I am jealous of 1.45% of you.
• I have people (apparently) reading from Sunnyvale, California; Houston, Texas; and Glendale, Arizona. Hello to you. (I question the accuracy of the location machine, it thinks I'm from Nova Scotia.)
• It is possible to find my site by searching for "mulholland drive, bon jovi". Wow.

There you have it.

Good night.

Four point zero?

I joined the Blogger Beta, you'll find some differences. The fact that this looks nothing like it used to is one. You're not allowed to edit the HTML yet, so I'm buggered in terms of making a title image, for now.


Also, I've switched over to the Blogger comments system, so any old comments don't really exist anymore. I might save a backup of them for kicks/blackmail.

I may post something for real later on.

Moment of Zen: I'm 'swell?' I'm large, bloated, and hefty? Does my being swell amuse you?

Get off my deck, you old queens!

Do not misread the title.

Two months, in the grand scheme of things, is not a long time.

My first order of business:

To everyone who plays NHL 06 on Xbox Live:
fuck you, let me play as Edmonton once.

Seriously. Just because you have one or two of the Oilers in your hockey pool doesn't mean you have to be a dick about it. You saw me highlight the jersey, you saw me choose the old-school logo, so why'd you have to go ahead and be the same team? It is wrong. Two of the same person cannot coexist, let alone at once upon ice. Maybe I'm just being weird, but it simply will not do.

Also, you're all cheap bastards. The wraparound goal wasn't sportsmanlike in NHL 94, and my thoughts on it have not changed in the past 12 years. For more than a decade, you've been a dick.

Elaine and I went to see The Da Vinci Code last night. It seems that pretty much everyone hates it, but damned if I can figure out why. Okay, it's not that great a movie, and it does take some liberties in explaining what's going on. For example, in the book (correct me if I'm wrong), Dan Brown never says what is under the Louvre, it's only implied. The movie, in one epic closing shot goes down and pretty much says "Hey! Look! Look what we found! GODDAMN IT LOOK!" I know why they did this, and I'm not offended by it in the least: summer film-goers have to be treated as idiots. I don't want to say that the movie wasn't for critics, but they're really getting the knickers all a-twisted for nothing. The movie, when it's all said and done, is a watered-down version of the book, dialogue-heavy with not much focus on action. So is that the problem critics have with it? "NOT ENUF 'SPLOSIONS OR DEM BOOBS!" Pretty much.

I will break it down as such: The book, while entertaining, was not an intelligent book. The way Brown wrote it made the reader feel smart, not unlike how first round Jeopardy! categories like "Letters starting with R" and "Shapes, Colours, and Animals!" make people feel smart. He took ideas from tons of Grail legends and, quite cleverly, strung them together using an old painter (and general wacko) as the glue that binds. Using the Coles Notes version of the Bible and a dog-eared copy of Holy Blood, Holy Grail, Brown made something that anyone who's heard of Jesus Christ and seen Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade can understand. The Da Vinci movie assumes that you've heard of neither, and works like a paint-by-numbers version of the book. It is simply an adventure movie that reads like a short story, and for critics to pan it as harshly as they have been seems like a waste of time. They go in expecting Citizen Kane, but with Jesus! and end up getting The Goonies Where Chunk Is Tom Hanks and the Old Lady is Magneto! (Which, come to think of it, would be fucking glorious.) My point is, they're letting the hype (that they themselves have wrought) and their expectations colour their opinion.

If it wasn't clear, my take on the movie is this: It's alright, not the best. I will likely buy it on DVD, and watch it maybe twice.

I now bite my lip in anticipation for X3. Go Dr. Frasier Crane!

I mentioned above that people at the theatre are to be treated like idiots. I would like to support my claim by stating that they are idiots. Come on, you come in the theatre, sit the fuck down. I don't mind if you've got a DS or Game Boy or someshit, but just sit down. I saw one kid with a soccer ball. Was the movie to be a FIFA-sponsored event? I don't know. Put the goddamn soccer ball away. It has no place in the theatre. Besides, who the hell let this kid in? How, as the ticket-taker kid, do you not notice a SOCCER BALL entering your establishment? Aside from fucking Pele doing his thing in the front row, we were surrounded by the standard-issue university frat wannabe. You know the type: American Eagle/Old Navy rugby shirt with the collar turned up, shorts (usually khaki or cargo), flip-flops, spiked/highlighted hair, little toughguy goatee, and if they have a hat on, it'll feature the logo for some (usually football) team, usually from a college not located in Canada. Basically the main demographic for Madden games. I'm serious, what the hell is wrong with you guys? It is 13 degrees out. Flip-flops and shorts are not cool at this temperature. Every time you come into my store, I pimpslap you. With my mind.

Speaking of people I dislike in my store, parents: please stop leaving your children with me. It does not please me. I see the parents come up to the store, and say "Alright, Cody/Hunter/Other Manly Name So My Child Does Not Grow Up Gay, you stay in the game store, I'm just going to The Bay, Transit, and Shoppers. Mommy needs new clothes, shoes, and meds." Does your kid know that The Bay is at the other end of the goddamn mall? Even running, it takes at least five minutes to get there. What can we do about the parents? Well, we tried turning off the systems. The kids just beg us to turn them on, because they're so bored. They then flip through the hint books, throwing off my meticulous order of Brand/Letter/System (it's not OCD, but close). Then they go and look at GameCube games, carry them to the PS2 wall, switch the games around, and move on to Xbox. Don't get me wrong, as much as I dislike the children, I don't blame them in the least. So we've started to tell the parents that they can't do this to us. You can't imagine the indignant faces they make, as if to say "Hah! You are in a game store! You're here to entertain my child, with games." Sorry, lady, it doesn't work that way. When I was a young buck, my parents wouldn't come into EB, they would sit out front as I proceeded to nerd it up. But there's the thing, they could always see me. If they wanted to leave, they'd say "Okay Daniel, we're going!" I'd protest a bit, and they'd start to walk away. Not five steps away, I'd catch right the hell up. Why? Fear. Was I a sissy? No. Maybe yes for other reasons, but not for this. Oh, shit, do I ever love video games, but if your parents are walking away, you'd damn well better follow. There's none of this fear in parents now, which absolutely blows me away. As retail counter-jockeys we can't tell parents to watch their kids, now we have to scare them. As sad as it is (and yes, I'm aware I don't have to, but for what it's worth, I give a damn about the kids a little bit), I ask them if they've heard of Lake Gibson. They stare for a second, usually say "good point", and get on with not buying anything. When I'm in a poppier mood, though, I tell them that the ball pit was taken out of the store a few weeks ago, but if they come back next week and leave their kids in our store we'll be happy to have them taken on a ride to the security office, where parents get to explain how it's not child neglect!

I may just make photocopies of this and hand them to children to give to mommy and daddy.

As far as I know, I've not made mention of our Elaine's cat in the blog. It is a cat called Chewie, partly named for Chewbacca, but moreso named for her penchant for chewing on my goddamn hand. Right now, she's currently stoned on the catnip, and passed out on the couch. I firmly believe that although she is sleeping, she continues to watch me. With malicious intent. I may post a picture of her in due time, but instead, let this placate you:


Awesome.

Check this out: I'm so proud. Bloody great. You have no reason not to use Firefox, unless you enjoy using unstable and unsecure browsers. Come on, kids, get with it. "Oh, wahhh, it takes up too much of the lol ram". Fair enough, but there are ways around it. "OHNOES it does not support [media type]!" Yes it does. They're called extensions. "But I don't know how to use it"/"it's very difficult!" I have no reply to this. Probably because if you think this, you're unable to read what I'm typing right now. So I can say stuff like people who aren't using Firefox for that reason are the lepers of the internet and should be exiled.

I hope you kids enjoy the new look of the blog. The new title bar is tastefully pretentious, I think. I would like to point out that I made the headphones on there from scratch in Photoshop. I think it looks pretty decent. I used my sexy Sennheisers as template. There are a few things I'm still trying to implement a bit better (new links, maybe a Frappr thing, also a Flickr box perhaps.) I'm open to suggestions.

I think I've done quite enough for this evening. Enjoy. I promise to post some more in the near future.

Moment of Zen: I'm afraid, Mocha Bear!

Mr. Peanut's fantastic night out

Just got finished cleaning up the blog. I've been meaning to adjust some crap for a while now, and I finally managed to sit down tonight and get it done. I've fixed a screw-up in the code for my Digg list, it actually updates now. The colours have been tweaked around a bit, I think for the better. Less bright on my eyes, at least. There are a bunch of quotes up top under the title image, and new pictures in the top right, both of which randomize when you refresh the page. Also, the archives have finally been made to work as they should, which pleases me. If any of you catch something here that's broken or missing, or you just don't like junk, leave a comment. Also, if anyone knows of any free iTunes-supporting Now Playing plugins for the blog, let me know. Thanks.

If you use MSN, check this out. I figured it out yesterday (pretty sure I'm not the first, but it's a revelation for me.) It gets rid of the lame-o tabs on the side of MSN without having to resort to any extra programs...Billy just hides this stuff pretty well.

So, some people have been asking what I'm doing with school. If I said I enjoy it, I'd be lying to you. I don't enjoy the tedium of having to make it there every other day, for very little reward. Right now, my focus is on work, and moving up in my store. With that in mind, my plan is to drop my courses at Brock and cut my losses, getting back what money I can from them. I'm planning on still taking classes, just through Athabasca University (recommended to me by my assistant manager and Chris.) My plan is to work my way up to assistant manager over the next year or so, and take classes via mail/internet on my own time.

This whole idea of major change doesn't bother me in the least. If anything, it's refreshing. I've realized that I'm happier now than I've ever been, living on my own, working, being with Elaine...all of it reminds me of a scene from Garden State.

You know that point in your life when you realize that the house that you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? All of a sudden even though you have some place where you put your shit that idea of home is gone. You'll see one day when you move out it just sort of happens one day and it's gone. And you can never get it back. It's like you feel homesick for a place that doesn't exist. I mean it's like this rite of passage, you know. You'll never have the feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for your kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I don't know, but I miss the idea of it. Maybe that's all a family really is. A group of people that miss the same imaginary place.

I'm in a place right now where I just put my shit, but even where my parents are doesn't seem like home. I'm not really sure why I've been thinking about that, but I think I'm on my way to creating a new idea for myself.

Moment of Zen: This one, potentially, could create a tiny spark.