18 September 2009


Hello kids.

Anyone who reads this probably already knows (except the #forum-m people…hello!), but my saga of not being able to see beyond a flickering haze is nearly over. Mid-October I've got to get an ultrasound on my eye, then at the end of the month I'll have the (hopefully) final surgery. I've already gone over the procedure in earlier posts, so I won't elaborate on that part. I'm just really happy that it's almost over.

I've done some math (!) on the subject. The time between the first emergency surgery last December and October's is 332 days. This converts to 7968 hours (or approximately the amount of time I've played various Pokemon games combined). I figured this research would have depressed me, but it hasn't. In fact, I'm more impressed by the number than anything. It's now 42 days between now and then, which pleases me, since 42 is the answer to life, the universe, and everything. If I had the faculties to do so I'd put a countdown timer on my blog, but I don't entirely care for tempting the fates.

Everything's winding down, which is good, because I'm getting really flipping bored. I've taken out almost all the good audiobooks at the library - I'm down to language courses and self-help books. Maybe I'll learn Arabic and teach myself to better cope with stress in the workplace. I can't wait to get my mobility back, to just go for an aimless drive or just wander around Zehrs to look at things. I like that. But the thing I'm most sick of is saying "When I can see…" Even euphemisms like "When I'm off the disabled list…" or "Upon such a time when mine ocular globes doth once again perform in a satisfactory manner…" are starting to get to me. I've tried to keep a running list of things I want to accomplish, because "When I can see…" is getting to be my goddamn catchphrase. The problem is I keep the list in my head, which isn't the most reliable place in the world. So, Here's a rough list of things I want to do, (sigh), when I can see.


- Rebuild Elaine's PC

- Rearrange the living room (optimized for Halo)

- Read 12 months of National Geographic

- Read 12 months of Penny Arcade

- Go through back issues of Game Informer

- Catch up on all the Zero Punctuation episodes I've missed

- Watch Big Bang Theory to pick up on visual nerdy things I'd other wise miss

- Sift through and clean out my "Giant Box of Papers"

- Read "Mastering the Art of French Cooking" by Julia Child

- Play the following: Prince of Persia (360), Halo 3: ODST (360), Professor Layton and the Diabolical Box (DS)…I'd like to get a DSi, for that matter…Still haven't played Mirror's Edge or beaten Force Unleashed, so there's that.

- Install a new hard drive and replace the battery in the MacBook

- Cook. I want to cook so badly, but I've got this (I consider it reasonable) fear of chef's knives and the oven. Put on dirty sunglasses, shut one eye, and squint with the other and you'll have some understanding of my apprehension.

- I'm going for a big fucking walk (or bike ride)

- I need to clean up the tags on my music files

- I'll be able to shave with some semblance of symmetry

- I'll actually be able to be emasculated by my brother-in-law's TV. In turn, I'll have to buy a larger one.

- I'll learn Vista, then I'll figure out what the hell Windows 7 is.

- I can go to Coles again!

- Giant drive in my dope whip

- "Is this Tylenol or Immodium?" I'll never ask again!

- For some reason, I miss Google Maps, a lot.

- Oh! I want to go for a helicopter ride! I want to wear the helmet that makes you sound like a Stormtrooper!

- I'll get to actually see Obama's inauguration

- Wheel! Of! Fortune!

- "There might, uh, be an english muffin somewhere…" I'll never have to say this to Elaine again!

- I'll also beat Elaine at Rock Band…drives me up the wall.

The list goes on, no doubt, but there you are.

Oh, hey, Clone Wars is almost on! Good day, everyone!